Who Can You Be in 40 Days?

Most of my Catholic youth I spent Lent looking at what I could give up. What would be “difficult” for me so that I could somehow become closer to God. I never thought of how that would work in bringing me closer to God back then. It just made me hate Lent for 40 days. As I have gotten older I have started to see a difference in how I look at Lent. Yes, I still try to give something up that I like, or think I need, but the hardest Lenten promise for me to find every Ash Wednesday is what am I going to do to become a better man. What habit will I break, or create, that is going to make me be the man I want to see when I look in the mirror every morning. Is it something that will make me a better husband, better son, better coach or teacher, or even a better brother (sorry Danna)? How am I going take look within to admit to myself that I may be falling a little short and can improve as a person somewhere in my life. It is truly one of the most difficult things I think a person can do.

​As the days leading up to Ash Wednesday start to come to an end I find myself running down the same circle logic of “why does it matter…what can I accomplish in just 40 days”. These moments, every year, are my personal temptation in the wilderness. In The Gospel reading today Jesus is directly tempted by Satan after being called to the wilderness by The Holy Spirit. He didn’t do anything wrong. He didn’t deserve to be tempted, but rather in His striving to grow closer to God temptation came to him. He was hungry, so he is tempted with food. He is uncomfortable, and he is tempted with the knowledge that God is with Him always and will comfort Him if he but asks. He as entered the world as a carpenter’s son that will have to suffer greatly, and is tempted with a lavish life where there will be no struggle. Some of the most basic needs (as we would see it) in Jesus’ life at the time he is offered a quick fix to there in the wilderness. Every Ash Wednesday as I know I am supposed to be working on becoming that better man in the mirror these very real temptations or doubts ofinsignificance creep in becoming that same offering of convenience. Jesus walked in the wilderness so that I would know I am not alone in these times. He was tempted by Satan himself, while I am just dealing with that little voice of doubt in my head.

​The truth is that the doubt I feel is just flat out not true. Who can I be in 40 days… more like what COULDN’T I do? I could be a totally different person. I could change my entire outlook on life or make a choice that will continue down my family tree for generations. I could also make a seemingly small change, like starting each day with gratitude, prayer, or meditation that may not rock the world around me but will change my world. All these changes have one thing in common… they all start with 1 step in the right direction. You just need to start. Will a diet work? Can I raise my GPA? Can I become the person I want to be? There is no way you know any of these outcomes for certain. It may take months, or years, to truly accomplish a diet or raising a GPA, but they all started with that first day. That first choice. The day when everything seemed so far away but also full of so much promise. Lent is a great time to try that out. Try on that change you think you may need or want for 40 days and see if it sticks. Change that reading of “It’s only 40 days” (full of how insignificant that short a time frame can be) to “It’s ONLY 40 days” (you can do anything for only 40 days).

​One of the mottos I try to envision comes from a social media team I used to follow. This group climbs, or attempts to climb, Mt. Everest without oxygen every calendar year. At the beginning and end of every day they post a picture or two of where they are camped and where they end their climb looking back at the distance covered. What I find so amazing about these posts is the differences in distances they cover as they progress up the mountain. Within the first couple of days their final pictures of the distances they travel look massive. The basecamp tents look like specs of dirt on the lens if you can see them at all. Then somewhere around basecamp three the pictures looking back at the camp look like they only covered 300 yards max. They were still hiking the same amount of time, maybe even the same steps, but every day as they get closer and closer to the summit the distances they covered in their 8-10 hours of hiking shrinks. One day that sticks out to me the picture looked like they covered 150 yards. The caption read that they had been hiking over 9 hours. Every morning’s post though the authors talked about how they must get up and get out of the tent. Just get started. Just… get… up! How easy it would be to just stop. The closer to the end they got I bet the temptations and doubts they felt grew more and more as they realized they would only be hiking a few hundred yards, carrying the oxygen they didn’t want to use, as the stages got more difficult. But every day they just had to get started an eventually they would summit the largest peak in the world.

​This Lent can be whatever you need it to be. Who will you be at the end? No one knows, but the only way to find out is to start today. The small decision you my make today may change your world. Don’t believe me. Once at basecamp 1 think about how long it should take to climb the rest of Everest… yep ONLY 40 days. So, who will you be in 40 days? Who COULD you be? It all starts with a small step today and don’t worry you aren’t alone. Jesus has already been here in this personal wilderness you are entering. He made a path. You just need to get started. Just… get… up! Just Keep Climbing!

Author: Matt Upton, Mathematics Department/Athletics

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