Happy Va-LENT-ines Day!

Before we get to the actual reflection, let’s address the noticeable coincidence that this year’s Ash Wednesday also happens to fall on Valentine’s Day. A quick Google search confirms that this has happened before– not so long ago in 2018, then 1934, 1923, and will happen again in 2029, which is the last time for this century. And now we know.

Ash Wednesday officially sets into motion the Lenten season of the Liturgical calendar. It is a day where Christians receive the ashen mark of the cross on their foreheads, signifying repentance from sin. Though not a holy day of obligation, it is a day of fasting (limit to one meal a day) and abstaining from meat. This last part might throw a wrench into some Valentine’s Day plans.

Some may be quick to point out the incompatibility of Ash Wednesday with Valentine’s Day. One day being a somber reminder of sin, sacrifice and mortality, while the other a celebration of love and friendship. The reality is that both do share similarities and I would think that when we frame love in the context of sacrifice, we transform love into its truest and purest form. Much like the love that we will witness of Christ this season of Lent.

I’ve always stressed to my Sophomores that the Bible is a love story between God and humanity. This love reaches its climax in the painful and dramatic death of Jesus on the cross. There’s no greater love than to give up one’s life for a friend, or in this case, for all of humanity. We see in Jesus the deep love of God, expressed in suffering and sacrifice.

One of my favorite encyclicals, “Deus Caritas Est” comes from Pope Benedict XVI. As the title so clearly states, God is… well, love. Pope Benedict describes our experience of God’s love in two ways: eros and agape. Eros is ascending, ecstatic and pleasurable love. Eros, to put it bluntly, feels good for the self. It feels good when we fall in love towards God and others.

If eros is self-serving, agape is self-denying. It is descending (towards others), and sacrificial love. Agape is when we offer and suffer for the good of another, just like what Jesus did.

As Christians, we might be drawn more towards agape love, however, Pope Benedict reminds us that “man cannot live by oblative, descending love alone. He cannot always give, he must also receive. Anyone who wishes to give love must also receive love as a gift” (7). Ultimately, we need both eros and agape in life. Perhaps this is the lesson we can draw from Valentine’s Day and Ash Wednesday occurring on the same day.

The fervor of romantic, mushy and lovey-dovey feelings of Valentine’s Day is eros, while the invitation to fast, abstain and sacrifice with Christ on Ash Wednesday is agape. It’s truly not a coincidence then, as Pope Benedict puts it, “...the more [eros and agape], in their different aspects, find a proper unity in the one reality of love, the more the true nature of love in general is realized” (7).

As we begin this season of Lent, let us remember God’s love and sacrifice, so that we in turn may express and gift others with our love and sacrifice.

Happy Va-LENT-ines Day!

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Work Cited:

Benedict XVI. “Deus Caritas Est.” The Holy See, 25 Dec. 2005. https://www.vatican.va/content/benedict-xvi/en/encyclicals/documents/hf_ben-xvi_enc_20051225_deus-caritas-est.html.

Author: Kenneth Gan, Campus Ministry